Phrases of Interest

Landing in Kabul and coming back into the airport, as we passed the poster at the entry we read its slogan: "Welcome to the home of the brave."  That's pretty apt for here, especially as just a couple of days ago the Taliban actually managed to make a successful attack in Kabul itself and killed several Afghan security forces.
Anyway, this entry is for a hodgepodge of interesting jargon or things I've heard people said that don't merit an entry on their own, but are mildly amusing.
For example, I recently received a document to review that was talking about a "Governors' Eradication Conference."  Normally, I believe, it is not US policy to eradicate governors, much less sponsor conferences openly advocating such a move.  But then again, this is not a normal post.  I signed off on it.
I also was treated to a lengthy presentation by a military colleague on certain projects and activities they were carrying out.  Their plans for the next few weeks included a vast series of "vertical and horizontal constructions."  I figured "vertical" constructions were buildings of some sort, which they were, but I confess I did not immediately pick up that a "horizontal construction" means ... a road.
Finally, during a recent trip to Helmand, where we have a rather large presence of Marines, a group of us we walking in the night toward the dining facility (the DFAC, indistinguishable from a school cafeteria except for the increased frequency of food fights).  It wasn't just dark; the atmosphere had that shusty smoggy mist suspended in the air typical of many places here.  And the base is poorly lit, since lights make it easier for anyone trying to aim a mortar to get lucky.  One of my companions, noting a group of several Marines walking in front of us, helpfully noted, "You know, it's really hard to see them if they're wearing camouflage at night."  He was serious, though he realized a couple of seconds after we started chuckling that it sounded like one of the less intelligent things he had said that day.  To his credit, he shrugged his shoulders, laughed it off and said, "You get little insights, you share them."
And finally, a serious one.  At one meeting with a dozen or more tribal leaders, one was asked in what way conditions had changed in his (it's always a he) village from Taliban times to now.  And he answered, "The Taliban tell you not to talk.  The government now tells you to speak, but doesn't listen to you."